Thursday, January 30, 2014


Today I filed for Social Security Disability.  Crohn's disease and all the problems I have managing my day to day life because of it has pushed the decision.  I met with a lawyer back in December but today was my actual application date.  I should be denied in about 3 to 5 months so I can appeal and try again. 

This process can actually be done over the phone with an actual person.  The woman I spoke to was really nice. But one word kept coming up as I described my condition to her - humiliating.  I was surprised that was the word I kept using too, but it just kept coming out of my mouth.  I guess I am feeling kind of humiliated lately because of my Crohn's. 

But belly hurts a lot lately and I've been going to the bathroom a ton.  I have an appointment with Dr. GI next week so hopefully he can help somehow.  I took Entocort for one month and I stopped going so much.  I had increased stomach pain but the diarrhea at lease slowed down.  Now that I'm off of it the diarrhea has started to increase and the belly pain has increased.  To me, that means I have inflammation in there some where that the Entocort helped and now needs attention.  I'm sure Dr. GI will see it differently though.

What words do you use to describe your disease?


cheryl said...

Hello dear one. I started the disability paper chase last fall. Humility used to be my word when I was still functioning somewhat but dealing with many many embarrassments. My word now is debilitating and limiting. It was a demoralizing process to tell my story to a disability attorney who was the " ice queen" of the extreme north. I have jumped through all the disability hoops reluctantly, wondering what "weakness" of mine they are trying to measure and how could these people understand. I have had to dig through 25 years of history which brought me thoroughly to a puddle of depression. I have filed my appeal and now await what I understand is a certainty that I will be rejected. But I am getting it done. Thank God for my husband and sisters support in this endeavor. Can't do anything really without my awesome support system!!!

Ajay said...

Hi Jenni, I'm just now going through the diagnosis of Crohn's, colonoscopy later this week. My Dr thinks the symptoms lean towards a 'yes'. I'd call it 'humiliation'.

I had an incident a few weeks ago in the grocery store that as a 52 year old man left me sobbing for days. Had an episode of dry heaves/retching in the soda aisle, legs collapsed, my butt started retching too. I wanted to die. Really. I shop in this store every week and the checkers all know me. I'm too humiliated to go back, the mental pic of me retching, crying and shitting haunts me, as I'm sure it haunts others too...

Ajay said...