Monday, October 6, 2008

What grates my cheese

There are a lot of funny things and positive things that can come from having a chronic illness. But I think I would like to take a moment to have a little pity party. Feel free to bring cupcakes to my party.

Things that grate my cheese about Crohn's

I'm constantly in the bathroom and always have to go at the worst times possible

I don't necessarily "look" sick or "sound" sick so therefore people assume I am not sick

People who think the world should stop when they experience diarrhea for one or two days. WHATEVER!

People who say "You have to go to the bathroom - AGAIN?!?!"

People who want to joke about my illness and restroom usage at moments when I don't think it's funny. It's my disease afterall, laugh when I laugh - cry when I cry. Support me - don't make fun of me!

Public restrooms, porta poopers and people who say they would NEVER use them. Must be nice to have the choice.

Chapped butt

Wondering if it is actually possible to poop out my guts completely

Being scared about long term affects of the disease and medications

Having a disease that creates grossness that no one in their right mind would like to hear about - such as rectal bleeding, anal fissures, hemorrhoids, diarrhea and what brand of toilet paper doesn't cause butt lint.

Wondering if I will be stuck in the bathroom when Jesus comes back and whether or not He will wait for me to finish. Really I think this is the most important question I have had lately.

That's about all I can think of right now. I have to go rest. I'm eating my "last meal" tonight since my colonoscopy is Wednesday. I haven't eaten much at all since last week. I have to be on liquids all day tomorrow until midnight and then nothing at all until after the procedure is over which will be around 1:30 pm on Wednesday. Did I mention Wednesday is the 18th anniversary of my dad passing away. Good thing anesthesia will be involved that day. So anyway - I'm going to attempt virtual suicide and eat a piece of pizza for my "last meal". Why not just go out with a bang huh? I'm in pain and have diarrhea when I eat nothing so I might as well enjoy myself.

Stay tuned. I'm gonna have pictures of my colon soon! I know you can't wait.


Eric Smith said...

holy duodenum batman!! Them's some cool intestinal graphics you got there!!

BrightSide said...

Oy! I totally agree with your points. I really hate when people assume it must not be 'that bad' if you don't actually look sick. *sigh*

Good luck tomorrow! I hope you get some answers!

Jenni Schaeffer said...

I'm actually going to track how many times I poop today. I'm up to seven so far and haven't even taken the colonoscopy prep yet!!!